Contributed and compiled by Mark Wroniak.
The following is only a partial transcript, as the author compiling it is unfinished with it.
Cuffed
Written by Steve Viksten
Music by Mark Mothersbaugh & Denis M. Hannigan
Directed by Jim Duffy
Chrisine Cavanaugh............Chuckie
Cheryl Chase....................... Angelica
Michael Bell...........................Drew, Chazz
In Drew and Charlotte's kitchen, Drew is wrapping presents...
Angelica: [excited] Ohh, Daddy, can I have the handcuffs, Dad ?
Drew: Sorry sweetheart, but these gifts aren't for you; they're for all the poor unfortunate children at the orphanage.
Angelica: I don't need all the toys; I just want the handcuffs.
Drew: Sorry Angelica.
Angelica: [pleading] But daddy, those kids won't miss one present; they're orphans. They're not used to getting presents You don't want to spoil them do you ?
Drew: Honey, when it's your birthday you can have all the presents you want.
Angelica: [emotionally hurt] Ohhh.
Drew walks out, Angelica follows.
Drew: Oh Angelica, I forgot to tell you; your little friend, Chuckie, is coming over to spend the afternoon. I want you to be nice to him this time.
Angelica: But daddy, he's no fun; he's just a baby.
Drew: [Putting the gifts on the top shelf of a closet] That doesn't mean you can cover his glasses in peanut butter.
Angelica: He didn't mind daddy; he thought it was funny.
The Door bell rings.
Drew: Oh, that must be Chuckie now.
Angelica: Ah great, the dumb kid with the goofy hair.
Drew answers the door to see Chazz and Chuckie
Chazz: Hi Drew.
Drew: Hi Chazz. Hi Chuckie.
Chazz: Listen, thanks for watching Chuckie for me.
Drew: Sure.
Chazz: Well, I gotta run; I don't want to be late for my Arthur Murray class. We're starting the samba today. [To Chuckie] Bye, Chuckie; be a good boy.
Charles dances away singing di di di hup dup dup dowadawa
Drew: [Yelling to Chazz] Don't worry about a thing Chazz; we'll take good care of Chuckie.[Shuts the door] Won't we, Angelica?
Angelica: Oh yes, Daddy; we'll have the bestest time.
Chuckie: [Gulps] Look Angelica; I'm sorry I had to come over. You don't have to play with me or anything. I'll just sit here by myself on the floor 'til my daddy comes back.
Angelica: Never mind that, Chuckie; there's an old saying, "When life hands you a lemon, make apple sauce".
Chuckie: Huh?
Angelica: I need you help. Now listen: we're going to sneak out into the hallway and go into the closet and get that handcuff set before my mommy and daddy can give it away to the orphans.
Chuckie: [confused] Handcuffs? Orphans? I don't know what you're talking about, but if I did I wouldn't think it was a very good idea.
Angelica: Well get over it Chumley; this is a dog eat dog-food world; there's givers and takers, and me, I'm a taker, now come on.
Chuckie follows Angelica through the house to the bottom of the stairs.
Angelica: Now you stay here and be the lookout. I'm gonna go into the closet and get that handcuff set. Now if anybody comes, yell.
Chuckie: O.K. Angelica.
Angelica goes to the closet, opens it, gets out a small step ladder, climbs up and takes a present from the pile on the top shelf. Suddenly Chuckie yells, startling Angelica who shoves the present back in the closet, climbs down the ladder, puts it away, shuts the closet door and runs to Chuckie.
Angelica: [puffing from running so fast] What happened ?
Chuckie: I saw something.
Angelica: Was it my mom?
Chuckie: No.
Angelica: Was it my dad?
Chuckie: No.
Angelica: Well what was it?
Chuckie: A mouse.
Angelica: A mouse? Where?
Chuckie points under a couch. Angelica walks over and pulls a sock from under it.
Angelica: Does this look like a mouse to you?
Chuckie: No.
Angelica: What does it look like?
Chuckie: A sock.
Angelica: Do you know why it looks like a sock?
Chuckie: [scratching his head] Errr.
Angelica: [yelling] Because it is a sock! [Throws sock at Chuckie] Now this time wait here and don't make a noise unless you see my mommy or daddy coming, got it?
Chuckie: [ remorseful] O.K. Angelica.
Angelica: Grrr!
Angelica walks to the closet again and is just about to get the present when Chuckie arrives.
Chuckie: Angelica.
Angelica: What?
Chuckie: Do you need any help?
Angelica: No I don't need any h..... HEY what are you doing here? You're supposed to be the lookout!
Chuckie: I got lonely.
Angelica: You dumb baby!
Chuckie: [The present falls from the closet almost hitting Chuckie] Aaaaah!
Angelica: Shh.[ closes the closet, picks up the present and runs] Come on.
Chuckie follows Angelica to her room where she pulls him in and shuts the door. Angelica then begins to frantically open the present.
This episode summary is Copyright 1996 by Mark Wroniak. Not to be redistributed in a public forum without permission. (The quotes themselves, of course, remain the property of and (c) 1993 by Viacom, and the reproduced articles remain the property of the original authors. I'm (Mark Wroniak) just taking credit for the compilation:)
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